Being only two months into 2009, I was copied into possibly the funniest personally drafted email so far this year.
A colleague at work is clearly upset at the locked down version of Firefox which was rolled out to him by my IT colleagues, the support guys –
Hi
I would like to raise a concern re: freedom of the internet using Firefox to its full potential. As I am sure you are aware it was installed for introducer reasons this week however I feel that I am being victimized and treated as an untrustworthy user. On a completely un-work related level I decided, excitedly to check out Firefox’s potential as an unmonitored internet source.
I was thoroughly shocked to find that despite its advertised potential to browse the internet without prejudice of Microsoft and the babysitting eye of the *** IT department this wasn’t exactly the case and the IT department had set in place a babysitting software to monitor my actions.
For example, when attempting to login into the facebook this afternoon, in order to catch up with some long lost friends for what I feel was a vital chance to catch up personally, discuss the forthcoming weekend, etc, and therefore lifting my personal moral which ultimately would have increased my motivation to earn more money for the company – potentially doubling, if not trebling my own personal income at the same time, I was stopped in my tracks due to a message that read ‘You either have the incorrect permissions to browse this website or it has been blocked for security reasons.’
It goes onto add that if you feel that if this is incorrect I should contact the IT department which is exactly what I am doing. Personally, this setback has hit me pretty hard as I felt sure that having Firefox on my system would allow me to be in direct contact with friends during work time. In fact I had a night out on Tuesday to celebrate this exciting change to work politics, so to find out this is not the case has not only ruined my reputation, it has also killed my confidence, terminated my workrate down to what can only be described as an alltime low and cost me in total £30 (One bottle of savignon blanc and a bangers and mash)
I hope therefore you would take a view on this outrageous (and frankly worthy a Nazi General)decision and at the very least issue an apology to my friends whom I promised I would be able to chat with during the day and issue me with All Bar One vouchers to the value of thirty English Pounds.
I await your response with anticipation.
Danny Denhard
Betalabs